The Worst Hotel In London Is Named Opulence Central London

Ignore the name; the Opulence Central London is a grotty, smelly, dirty little hovel that prevented me from getting more than two hours sleep on the one miserable night that I stayed there.

My room was in the basement with a small window opening out to a full view of London's Gloucester Place above. The room was swelteringly hot (while outside was cool), but opening the drape on the window, the only source of cooling, meant that anybody could look in. Gloucester Place is a busy road, so the outside noise level was high. I asked the guy in reception if this was the worst room and he wasn't sure. That didn't augur well. Although he did offer to upgrade me for $300 (seriously).

A white appliance-like object sat next to the window, apparently an air conditioner. The trouble was that the heat outlet at the back was inside the room, meaning that running it warmed, rather than cooled, the room.

The room was tiny, requiring the bed to be moved every time I wanted to get to the window. The bathroom was non-functional. There was nowhere to place toiletries. The shower was too small to turn around in without soaking the floor. The cold faucet produced hot water until fresh water filled the pipes.

There was no phone in the room. The dresser did not open, so there was nowhere to put my clothes. The bed was hard and there were no spare pillows (maybe they were in the locked dresser). The whole room, indeed the whole hotel, smelled musty. This room cost me $128.36.

Reception is a nook at the top of the stairs where there is not even a landing. The front door looks nice, which may explain why it features in all their advertisements.

I strongly recommend avoiding the tragically misnamed Opulence Central London unless your only alternative is a homeless shelter. No, the homeless shelter may have better climate control.