What You Need To Know About Bringing Your Own Birthday Cake To A Restaurant

Birthdays are a special occasion where we can expect certain luxuries: to spend time with friends, be showered with gifts, and enjoy some of our favorite things. One other fun perk: this might be the only time we have permission to bring your own cake into a restaurant. While the idea of bringing a dessert to your favorite eatery sounds simple on paper, it comes with its own baggage. If you're considering bringing your birthday cake to a restaurant this year, you should know a few things first.

One, you should tell the staff of your plans ahead of time. Some restaurants have strict rules about outside food, which might apply even on your special day. A phone call ahead of time is better than an awkward conversation with your server later on. Even if you get permission to bring your own cake, keep in mind that some restaurants charge 'cakeage' fees for outside desserts. If you're not taking advantage of the dessert options on the menu, but you're still using the restaurant's plates and napkins, it just makes sense.

While many people see the act of bringing your own cake to a restaurant as innocent, it does have its drawbacks. Let's dive deeper into why some people consider this simple act a big deal.

While some might see no problem bringing a cake to a restaurant, others see things differently. As one restaurant owner shared with The New York Times, some establishments don't love when customers bring outside desserts for a few reasons. One is that it can potentially "undermine" in-house pastry chefs who have worked hard to curate a dessert menu. (That applies even if you do have one of the coolest birthday cakes around.) With the excess dirty dishes and additional time you spend at the restaurant without adding to your bill, having your cake also ends up eating into the restaurant's profits — and your server's tips. Some restaurants also consider bringing in outside food a big liability issue. These are all reasons for the rise of cakeage fees.

One columnist from Saint Louis Magazine had a different take on the situation and argued that it all depends on how you approach things. He says you should go for it if you practice common courtesy, such as calling the restaurant beforehand. Leaving a slice of cake and a big tip for the server couldn't hurt things. Other Reddit users agreed and thought that calling ahead was the best route since every establishment has different rules. 

If you're still on team cake in this bring-your-own-cake debate, here are some do's and don'ts you should follow to ensure the experience is conflict-free. 

First, just make sure you are following those basic rules. Call ahead first to make sure it's okay that you bring a cake. It's wise to bring all of your own supplies such as candles, a lighter, plastic plates and utensils, and even your own way to cut it to make sure the process goes extra smooth. Once it is time to cut the cake, try your best not to disturb the other tables. This could mean different things depending on the restaurant's ambiance. For one example, if you're dining at a quiet, intimate establishment, maybe don't opt to sing happy birthday at the top of your lungs this time. And lastly, pay attention to the traffic that's coming in and out of the restaurant. If things are really busy, you should probably choose not to spend excess time cutting cake and opening gifts. Servers are probably waiting to turn over your table. Now that you're aware of both sides of this great cake debate, the choice is up to you.