How Did Friendsgiving Get Its Start?

The term "Friendsgiving" may be relatively new to the lexicon of American portmanteaus, but the concept of spending the last Thursday in November with one's dearest pals is likely much older. The term suggests an alternative to the Thanksgiving tradition, which tends to favor the nuclear family over the chosen family. That might be why so many Turkey Day dinners culminate in heated arguments between those who are bound to each other by blood and not by choice. If you think we're generalizing, just look at popular Hollywood depictions of dysfunctional family gatherings — "Home for the Holidays" is a good one.  

Unless you're someone that gets along swimmingly with your parents, siblings, and extended family members, the idea of spending the day with friends might be a welcome substitute. If you love spending time with both your family and your friends, you might treat Friendsgiving as a casual potluck dinner that occurs a week or two before the actual holiday. If you're looking for a piece of trivia to share at the table, fill in your fellow dinner guests on the various origin stories behind the word. 

There are several theories behind the origin of the word "Friendsgiving." Merriam-Webster added the term to the books in January 2020 and links it to a 2007 tweet posted by the Usenet group (Friends of the Friendless). "Happy Friendsgiving Y'all!!!," reads the tweet, followed by a second post a couple of weeks later that reads, "Because we all had so much fun this Friendsgiving we forgot to do secret Santa." While this is the earliest evidence of the term that Merriam-Webster could find, that doesn't necessarily mean the term didn't exist before those tweets. "Given the fact that the word isn't explained in these posts and tweets, it's likely that Friendsgiving was floating around in spoken English for a bit before it showed up in written English," says Merriam-Webster, adding that the pattern is "pretty standard for new vocabulary." 

Others credit the term to the beloved sitcom "Friends," which features several episodes in which the friends in question spend Thanksgiving together as opposed to their families. As Ashley Fetters wrote in The Atlantic in 2018, "hosting a Thanksgiving meal among friends has become a standard part of the celebration for many young adults."